From the Rock Island Argus, July 31, 1913. By Henry Howland.
She tried this thing and then tried that
To keep from growing frightful;
She thought when she was like a slat
That plumpness was delightful;
But, having lost her slenderness,
She starved herself and banted;
Each added pound brought new distress,
And dismally she panted.
She tried to fight the wrinkles back
By using many lotions;
She sighed, “Alas!” and sobbed, “Alack!”
And harbored sad emotions;
Her eyes, once beautiful, no more
Were filled with fine expression;
She lost the smile that years before
Had been her choice possession.
She tried in many, many ways
To keep from growing frightful;
Of all things that she valued, praise
Was always most delightful;
She mourned the hardness of her lot,
Her eyes were often tearful—
And all because she’d just forgot
The need of keeping cheerful.