He Kicked the Dog

From the New York Tribune, March 7, 1914. By Arthur C. Sharp.

Sued in the Municipal Court for $100 because he caused the death of a bulldog belonging to Antonio Angarano, Arthur C. Sharp has filed his answer in poetry. The verses read:

Now comes defendant and submits
His answer to the court. Admits
That at the time and at the place
He kicked said bullpup in the face.

Admits he lives in Syracuse—
Denying that is little use.
All other things in said complaint
Are here denied because they “Ain’t.”

Defendant, answering plaintiff’s claim,
For further defense to the same,
Alleges that said dog was bad,
Ugly, vicious, cross and mad.

And often in a rage would fly
At dogs or people passing by,
And for a long time he had stood
A nuisance in the neighborhood.

Defendant says that on this day
As he was passing on his way,
He saw before his horses’ feet
This bulldog fighting in the street.

Defendant, trying to do right
Endeavored then to stop the fight;
Alleges that said dog was wild
With hunger, and his temper riled.

And at aforesaid time he tried
To breakfast off defendant’s hide.
Defendant, showing common sense,
Then kicked the pup in self-defense.

Wherefore, defendant now insists
Plaintiff’s complaint should be dismissed,
And if the action he has lost
Demands that plaintiff pay the cost.