Der Inspector

From the Harrisburgh Telegraph, March 9, 1914. By Wing Dinger.

Up in Albany der bunch
    Of Lawmakers got busy
Discussing Tangos, Castle Walks
    Und other dances dizzy.

Vun chap said, “Ugh, dey neffer saw
    Such sights in grandpa’s day
As can be seen most any night
    About der cabaret.

“You’ll see a couple slide about,
    Ven suddenly dey slip
Und mit der knees dey hit der floor,
    Dat’s vat dey call der dip.

“Or maybe in der middle of
    A dance der girl vill faint,
Her partner holds her off der floor,
    But she unconscious ain’t.

“Dat only is anudder stunt
    Dat makes der dance unique,
Und dere’s a heap of udder dings
    About vhich I could speak.

“But vat I want to say is dis,
    Dese dances shouldn’t be,
So I vill resolution dat
    Ve name a Committee.

“Und it vill go about der State
    Investigating dings
About dese naughty dances, und
    Make some recommendings.”

Und ven der news got spread abroad,
    Such crowds you neffer saw
For jobs on der committee to
    Inspect dose dances raw.