After Rud Kip

From The Topeka State Journal, November 8, 1912.
By Roy K. Moulton.
 

 When the husband meets his helpmeet every morning in debate,
 And he’s trying to explain to her why he was out so late,
 There never is any question that his arguments will fail,
 For the female of the species can talk longer than the male.
 
 When the argument is hottest and they get down to brass tacks,
 And they land each other’s relatives a lot of pungent whacks;
 You would think that hers were angels and that his should be in jail,
 For the female of the species can think faster than the male.
 
 When they’re whacking up the boodle that he’s earned throughout the week,
 And deciding how to spend it, he’s a pretty helpless geek;
 It is hard for him to look at his percentage of the kale,
 For the female of the species can grab quicker than the male.
 
 When they do their weekly shopping and they linger ‘round the store,
 Till the husband thinks that living is a most decided bore;
 She can take her a 50-cent piece and get dry goods by the bale,
 For the female of the species can buy cheaper than the male.
 
 When it comes to information on the gossip of the day,
 On the neighborhood activities and things that people say,
 She has got her husband beaten when she gets up on the trail,
 For the female of the species can “hear” lots more than the male.