From The Topeka State Journal, October 28, 1912. When Nellie goes upstairs to dress, I take a magazine, And read about the wonders of Some far-off foreign scene; An article of men who graft, The Wall Street system, too; Also the editor’s remarks On what next month he’ll do. I light my pipe and puff away The while the page I scan, And read a Robert Chambers tale About some love-sick man. A muck-rake expert leads me through A bale of torrid stuff Explaining how a lot of men Got rich upon a bluff. I read the advertisements next, Of collars, kodaks, cars, And breakfast foods and underwear, Tobacco and cigars. A liberal education I Obtain, I must confess, The evening we are going out And Nellie starts to dress.