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Tangled Lives

From the Evening Star, July 26, 1913. By Philander Johnson.

Oh, Bull’s-Eye Bill was a burglar bold
    Who never did what he was told.
He smoked and chewed and swore and drank
    And his greatest pleasure was to rob a bank.

Miss Susan Slosh was a suffragette,
    A militant of the ultra set.
She’d burn a castle or she’d wreck a train
    Or heave brick-bats through a window pane.

When Bull’s-Eye Bill and Susan wed
    ’Twas a very fine match, the neighbors said.
But Bill got blue ‘cause his wife would roam.
    She’d rather go to prison than remain at home.

The tears would course down his cheeks so pale
    As he begged her to please come out on bail.
“A jail’s all right for a man,” says he,
    “But it ain’t no place for a woman to be.”

So they disagreed an’ their ways they went.
    She gets locked up to her heart’s content.
And Bill gets to cussin’ now and then
    ‘Bout women usurpin’ the sphere of men.